Post by Meg on May 5, 2008 15:41:40 GMT
Jane: I think you should just admit that you're a big softy. That this whole cynical thing is just an act so that you can seem wounded, and mysterious, and sexy.
Kevin: Whoa whoa whoa. What was the last one?
Jane: What?
Kevin: Did you say sexy?
Jane: What?
Kevin: Do you think I'm sexy?
Jane: No.
Kevin: It's OK if you do.
Jane: I don't.
Jane's Aunt: Must be so hard to watch your younger sister get married before you.
Jane: Yes. Then I remember that I still get to have hot hate s e x with random strangers and I feel SO much better!
Tess: You won't share that information with me about him. You wouldn't hurt a fly. Besides, I'm your sister.
Jane: That was yesterday. Today you're just the b*tch who broke my heart and cut up my mother's wedding dress.
Kevin: Wait, what are those?
Jane: Nothing.
Kevin: Are those?
Jane: NO.
Kevin: Are they bridesmaid dresses?
Jane: This is none of your business!
Kevin: Ohhh... good God. What, you kept them all? You have a whole closet full, why?
Jane: I have a lot of friends and I like to keep them.
Kevin: Right. Well, that makes complete sense because they're... beautiful.
Jane: Some of them are not that bad.
Kevin: Not that bad? I'd like to see one of them that's not that bad.
Kevin: What about you? You don't have any needs?
Jane: No. I'm Jesus.
Kevin: What color is that - vomit?
Jane: I never do anything like this.
Kevin: I know.
Jane: You do?
Kevin: Yes, you kept repeating that over and over last night - I never do anything like this... I NEVER do anything like this... I never do ANYTHING like this...
Kevin: [in Jane's apartment, with her showing off her dresses as she pulls out a loud-looking Gone With The Wind dress] What is that?
Jane: [holding the dress up to herself] Theme wedding!
Kevin: What was the theme? Humiliation?
Jane: Can you please find somebody else to be creepy with?
Kevin: Jane, can I have $50?
Jane: No.
Kevin: Jane, can I have $50?
Jane: No.
Kevin: [takes hand lovingly] Jane, I REALLY need $50, can i have the $50?
Jane: [hesitant] ... No?
Kevin: [laughing] See? That was good!
[grabs Jane's drink]
Kevin: Jane, can I have your drink?
Jane: Sure.
Jane: Oh yeah, I'm a real good caulker.
Kevin: [into recorder] Likes caulk.
Kevin: You'd rather focus on other people's Kodak moments than make memories of your own!
Kevin: Love is patient, love is kind, love is slowly going out of your mind.
Jane: You would rather hang out with Italian models than come with me to my awesome work party?
Jane: I feel like I just found out my favorite love song was written about a sandwich.
Jane: [after passing out] Are you a doctor?
Kevin: No, but Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Drunk were bugging me.
Casey: What? Don't look at me like that! The b*tch said "Up" so it's up!
Kevin: You kinda look like a shiny mermaid.
Jane: Wanna go find the ugliest stuff in the store and register Tess for it?
Kevin: Let's do it.
Kevin: Whoa whoa whoa. What was the last one?
Jane: What?
Kevin: Did you say sexy?
Jane: What?
Kevin: Do you think I'm sexy?
Jane: No.
Kevin: It's OK if you do.
Jane: I don't.
Jane's Aunt: Must be so hard to watch your younger sister get married before you.
Jane: Yes. Then I remember that I still get to have hot hate s e x with random strangers and I feel SO much better!
Tess: You won't share that information with me about him. You wouldn't hurt a fly. Besides, I'm your sister.
Jane: That was yesterday. Today you're just the b*tch who broke my heart and cut up my mother's wedding dress.
Kevin: Wait, what are those?
Jane: Nothing.
Kevin: Are those?
Jane: NO.
Kevin: Are they bridesmaid dresses?
Jane: This is none of your business!
Kevin: Ohhh... good God. What, you kept them all? You have a whole closet full, why?
Jane: I have a lot of friends and I like to keep them.
Kevin: Right. Well, that makes complete sense because they're... beautiful.
Jane: Some of them are not that bad.
Kevin: Not that bad? I'd like to see one of them that's not that bad.
Kevin: What about you? You don't have any needs?
Jane: No. I'm Jesus.
Kevin: What color is that - vomit?
Jane: I never do anything like this.
Kevin: I know.
Jane: You do?
Kevin: Yes, you kept repeating that over and over last night - I never do anything like this... I NEVER do anything like this... I never do ANYTHING like this...
Kevin: [in Jane's apartment, with her showing off her dresses as she pulls out a loud-looking Gone With The Wind dress] What is that?
Jane: [holding the dress up to herself] Theme wedding!
Kevin: What was the theme? Humiliation?
Jane: Can you please find somebody else to be creepy with?
Kevin: Jane, can I have $50?
Jane: No.
Kevin: Jane, can I have $50?
Jane: No.
Kevin: [takes hand lovingly] Jane, I REALLY need $50, can i have the $50?
Jane: [hesitant] ... No?
Kevin: [laughing] See? That was good!
[grabs Jane's drink]
Kevin: Jane, can I have your drink?
Jane: Sure.
Jane: Oh yeah, I'm a real good caulker.
Kevin: [into recorder] Likes caulk.
Kevin: You'd rather focus on other people's Kodak moments than make memories of your own!
Kevin: Love is patient, love is kind, love is slowly going out of your mind.
Jane: You would rather hang out with Italian models than come with me to my awesome work party?
Jane: I feel like I just found out my favorite love song was written about a sandwich.
Jane: [after passing out] Are you a doctor?
Kevin: No, but Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Drunk were bugging me.
Casey: What? Don't look at me like that! The b*tch said "Up" so it's up!
Kevin: You kinda look like a shiny mermaid.
Jane: Wanna go find the ugliest stuff in the store and register Tess for it?
Kevin: Let's do it.
